I have experience with domestic violence in dating.

The first experience with domestic violence was a man I dated in college. He held me at gunpoint and threatened to either kill me or rape me.

The SWAT team came in before he could do either because a neighbor in the apartment complex had done the right thing.

She notified the police when she heard me screaming.

A man whom I had a long-term relationship with choked me when he got angry.

 I did not call the police.

I should have.

I do not know if he would have been arrested. But that may have discouraged him from further violent acts.

This same man knocked the mirror off my car in a rage. I filed charges against him but dropped the charges when he agreed to have the mirror replaced.

It sickens me to think I filed charges regarding damage to my car but failed to file charges when I was a victim of domestic violence.

The third was a man I dated for two-and-a-half years. He was an alcoholic and although he did not beat me; I was savvy enough to know that he had the personality of an abuser. I left before it got physical.

Last night I heard the story of another victim of domestic violence. She had been married to her husband for 24 years and had suffered abuse by him.

She did not call the police.

Now they are getting divorced.

She is making allegations of domestic violence. Without a police report, those allegations may not hold up in divorce court.

Woman.  if a man lays a hand on you in anger, violence, or frustration it is HIS problem NOT yours!

Call the police.

It is important to have it documented.

In my experience, the man usually blames the woman for his anger and physical abuse. You are NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR HIS ABUSE.

 Get out of the relationship and go to a safe place.

The number for the National Domestic Violence hotline is 1-800-799-7233.

If you do not protect yourself, you are not protecting your children.

In the novel, The Shattered Vase, Suzie Whatley is a victim of domestic violence, but she is so much more than a victim. Buy The Shattered Vase to learn how to heal from abuse!

To read more of my dating exploits, look at this post…https://www.theshatteredvase.com/index.php/2020/05/19/a-guy-on-zoosk/

This blog post is reprinted with modifications from my original blog which is https://singleparentssurvivalguide.com/